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Oh, yeah. My hair is purple, by the way!

i-am-that-monster:

thatshinyobject:

kingsleyyy:

2015 is only 5 months away, just let that sink in

What the fuck does the sink want now

image

thebeastfromthebigeast:

quackenbuschlight:

i remember one time this dude sent me a shirtless pic with the caption “lol maybe u can save this for a rainy day ;)”

and i was like “for what? to keep me dry? because that’s what it’s doing right now”

image

Moving back to Aurora, living apart from my boyfriend for an undetermined amount of time…. I had all these predictions about how we’d fall apart.

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thewordsofclayton:

sirtarantino:

a guy walked into the board room and said

"hi sweetheart if you could fix me up a coffee real quick im meeting with the regional reports manager in like five minutes, thanks darling"

and i just stared at him and coldly said

"i am the regional reports manager"

we are now twenty minutes into this board meeting and i dont think i’ve ever seen a man look so embarrassed and afraid in my whole life

Good

supersmashthestatebros:

no Santa, they’re not gifts, they’re jifts.

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